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...helping you find true love and happiness through your relationships

Why Love Is Your Natural State (What is Love?)



d fear we are left with the b=of ourWhat is love? essence - full of creativity, abundance and joy.

Have you ever asked the questions - What is love? The relationship model that underlies this website has as its most fundamental idea, that love is our essence - it's who we are. But why should this be - surely fear and suffering could just as easily be our natural state of existence?

For thousands of years philosophers, mystics and clerics have encouraged us to let go of fear and embrace the love that is available to us from our Universal connections. If we do this, experience tells us that our lives and relationships get better - we become, happy, creative, sucucessful and fulfilled. This website continues this theme, and is designed to help you move back to your elemental state of love and connection.

With the advances in modern physics we are beginning to see why love might be such an important part of the Universe - maybe even the part that allows us to exist! In recent years there has been a huge effort put into understanding what makes up matter - looking at the minuscule particles that buzz around in all of us, and in everything we see. Many particles have already been identified, but one has remained illusive - the so called Higgs Boson.

Finding the Higgs Boson has been a major task at Cern in Switzerland, using the immensely powerful (and huge!) Large Hadron Collider. I won't bore you with the physics, but this machine is a way creating and then observing the tracks of ' particles that are far too small to see with the naked eye. The scientists seem to be on the verge of identifying the Higgs Boson. That is impressive, but why is this so relevant to love and relationships?

Despite their mathematical expectations, the particle physicists have found that the Universe is not in balance – there is more matter, than anti-matter. I know it is weird to think of anti-matter, but apparently they have already proven it exists in experiments. Before I lose you in the physics, let me try and bring it back to the human scale. Science is telling us that ‘something’ is allowing us to exist (similar quantities of matter and anti-matter would cancel each other out) – or putting it another way – there is a bias towards creation, rather than destruction in the Universe. The Higgs Boson seems to be the particle that is important in creating this bias, hence the keen interest in it.

It is not surprising that The Higgs Boson has appeared in media headlines because it has been called the ‘God Particle’. Some scientists are probably hoping that its discovery will explain away spirituality and end the need for religion, but I think this completely misses the point. Even if we find a particle that allows the creation of matter, it does not tell us how, or why this should be the fundamental truth of the Universe. The source of the creative flow will probably always remain a mystery, but all of us will have experienced it at some time in our lives. It is what we call love.

I find the idea that God is love – the same creative ‘force’ that is described in the science of The Higgs Boson, very comforting. Over the millennia, God has been many things to many people, but if you look closely at the messages at the heart of all the world’s major religions and spiritual paths, you will find that the concept of divine or Universal love is common to all of them. What these faiths tell us is that there is an underlying goodness, beneficence and love in our Universe and in our world, and that we can tap into it at any time. We become happy and have successful relationships when we remember this and embrace the self-love that is our true state of being.

I know that applying this principle on a daily basis in your relationships is far from easy, but the opportunity is always present if you make the choice to be in the flow of the Universe, rather than swim against it. Love, compassion and forgiveness in your relationships will always win out in the end, because it is the underlying truth of the Universe.

Interested in applying these ideas to your relationship?


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A book that will help you understand the
man in your life...

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No 1. Relationship
Problem-Solving Tip

Turning Love on it's Head

Why Love Is Your Essence

The Stages of A Relationship
Power Struggle

Dead Zone

Partnership & True Love

How to Save or Improve any Relationship

The Power of Love

Triangle Model Explained

Understanding Emotions

The Origins of Guilt & Low

Top Ten Relationship Tips

Top Ten Dating Tips

Two Hearts Really
Can Beat As One





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