Loading

Understanding Love . Blog . Books . Articles . Counselling . Workshops . Contact Us . Useful Websites . Privacy

Can't find what you are looking for? Try the site search





 

Legal Notice - Medical Advice
All advice in this website is given in good faith and no responsibility can be accepted by the website owners for issues or problems that occur as a consequence of using the website content. If you have any concerns about your psychological health you are advised to contact a doctor or other suitably qualified medical/psychiatric practioner.

This site is based on the principles of The Psychology of Vision. Please note that the content of the site is not endorsed by the organisation, and they cannot be held responsible for the content

© P.J.Granger 2012

 

 

 

iloveyouloveme.com
...helping you find true love and happiness through your relationships

Making Love and Tantric Sex

– Bringing the Physical, Emotional
and Spiritual Aspects of a Relationship Together

Sex can be one of the most enjoyable and beautiful aspects of a relationship, but it can also be the source of great frustration and disappointment. In this article I would like to discuss how we can enhance our relationships by integrating the physical, emotional and spiritual parts of who we are - truely making love (or what is called Tantric Sex)

Perhaps the simplest way to think about sex is as energy – life energy. When we embrace it without fear and guilt, it is a celebration of our most basic essence as human beings. When we express our sexuality as a celebration of love it becomes safe and can take us to the highest levels of joy and euphoria. Sex moves from a mere physical gratification to a joining of two people on physical, emotional and spiritual planes. It is as if two people melt into each other and their energies become one. This is the realm of Tantric sex.

Of course, achieving such a level of joining in a relationship is not always easy. Many of my articles and website pages describe the barriers that stop us from closely joining another person in a relationship. Every one of these barriers can be traced back to a level of guilt and low self-esteem. If we are not feeling physically or emotionally close to our partner, then there is a fear of intimacy. We are afraid to get to close to them in case they see us, in the way that we see ourselves. If we are harbouring any self-attack or low self-worth, we will be scared that intimacy will allow them to see the things that we hate about ourselves and which we believe puts us at risk of rejection. Of course, all our negative self-beliefs are mistakes and our partner will love us despite our assumed shortcomings.

Sexual guilt is a specific form of guilt that we can easily pick up in life. This can come from a rather sheltered or overtly religious upbringing where sex is seen as dirty and somehow bad. It can also originate in Oedipal family relationships, where there is guilt for having fallen in love at a very tender age with a parent of the opposite sex. Such is the taboo in such situations that we make take on extreme levels of shame and then bury these deep in our subconscious mind. This guilt is then triggered when we come physically close to a partner. It damages our relationship and robs us of the joy of a good sex life.

In all situations where there are sexual problems or difficulties, it is important to work to let go of guilt. This will always involve a process of forgiveness. There will be a forgiveness of self as well as the people in our lives around whom we have taken on negative self-concepts. In a relationship it is important to talk about your feelings around sex – your partner will usually have similar concerns. It is only through communication that you will be able to bring the negative feelings into the open for them to be healed. The process of coming back together physically make take some a little time – don’t rush it. It may start with kind words and appreciation for a partner. You may want to tell them why you love them emotionally and physically. A gentle caress or kiss can make it easier to close the physical and emotional distance. Remember, it only takes one person in a relationship to break a deadlock and start putting the love back into it.

Often people talk of the difference between men and women when it comes to sex. It can seem that women look for more love when they have sex and men for more short-term physical gratification. While this may be true as an observation, I believe that this happens because men are so often out of touch with their feelings. For them sex is often ‘in the head’ and then loses so much of its potential for love and pleasure when it also comes from the heart. Women can help their men by recognising that they are often afraid of their emotions and sensitively encourage them to begin to express them in an open and honest way. As feelings are made visible in a relationship, and providing we own our own feelings, rather than projecting them onto our partners, we can move emotionally closer. As this happens, the fear and guilt in the relationship and around sex will dissipate.

As the emotional barriers are dismantled in a relationship, a lot more love will be given and received by both partners. In bed this will translate to much greater feelings of connection with our partners and this will open the doors to sex that takes us into the higher realms of consciousness. For those with a spiritual belief you can imagine a developing Union between you and your partner such that the physical separation is removed and depending on your belief system, you become one with God, the Universe, Spirit or Heaven. As you melt into each other your physical boundaries fade away and there is surge of love, joy and divine connection.

To achieve such amazing levels of connection it helps to make strong eye-contact during your love making and feel as much love as you can for your partner while being completely open to the love they are giving you. Feel the love flowing in both directions via your eyes. Also allow all you senses (touch, smell, taste, hearing and sight) to be open to the beauty of the moment. Celebrate and appreciate your partner. Allow yourself to feel as much love as you can – just surrender and fall into it. This mutual giving and receiving acts as a positive cycle and will build up to a very strong level of connection. See how far you can take it!

Love is what transforms sex from simple physical gratification to an amazing experience of joining with another human being. Love makes sex safe and full of integrity. Love really is all that there is once we have joined fully with our partners. 'Making love' and tantric sex are the pinnacle of partnership in a romantic relationship.

If you have found this article useful, you will a whole chapter on it in my book - "Bringing Back The Love"


Please feel free to share this with anybody you know, who might find it useful
Sharing and Privacy

 

 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 





These articles are based on my self-help books that are full of practical tips about how to bring more love, passion and joy to your relationship


'Bringing Back The Love'
How to fall in love all over again!

LOOK INSIDE! at

Amazon USA

Amazon UK


(also available on your
local Amazon site)

 

 

Everything you need to know about men, emotions and love

 

 

 

Skype counselliing
sessions
now available

Please click for more information

 

"When Two Hearts
Beat As One"

Ground-breaking scientific research about relationships

See the latest research that shows us that our hearts can communicate in non-sensory ways, even when we are separated from the people we love!

 

 

 

 



 

 

 


 

 

 


 



How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship

Unconditional Love

Men, Emotions and Relationships

How to Have The Life You Want
- The Art of Receiving

How to Let Go of Somebody
from the Past

Save my Marriage or Relationship

Spirituality, Love & Relationships

How Neediness Damages Relationships

Love - Turning Everything We Know About It On Its Head

Why Relationships Become Boring
and How to Spice them Up!

Making Love - Bringing the Physical, Emotional and Spiritual Aspects of a Relationship Together

Cheating, Affairs & Infidelity

Sadness - How To Overcome It

How to Avoid Arguments & Rows in a Relationship

Living a Carefree Life of Ease

Surving a Recession - How to bring Abundance to your Relationship & Life

Unrequited Love - Its Origins & How
To Move On From It

Bad Choices - Why we sometimes
choose a partner who is bad for us

The Art of Manifesting - Choosing
the Life & Relationship You Want

Love Sickness - It's Causes
& It's Remedies

8 Steps to Save Your Relationship

Why We Are Afraid of Love

How to Become Irresistible to your Partner

Save Your Marriage or Relationship

Is it possible to love more than one
person at the same time?

Letting Go of Envy & Jealousy

Marriage, Commitment & Love

True Giving

Small Acts of Kindness

Why it is impossible to be independent and have a successful relationship

What is Your True Purpose in Life and How This Affects Your Relationship

How Your Unconscious Mind Can
Rule Your Relationship & Your Life

The Things We Don't Tell Our Partner...

How To Heal A Broken Heart

How to Find Love (a Partner)

Emotional Attachment

How can I change my partner's behaviour?

Dealing With Rejection

 

Free Online Relationship Coaching
Share
with friends