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All advice in this website is given in good faith and no responsibility can be accepted by the website owners for issues or problems that occur as a consequence of using the website content. If you have any concerns about your psychological health you are advised to contact a doctor or other suitably qualified medical/psychiatric practioner.

This site is based on the principles of The Psychology of Vision. Please note that the content of the site is not endorsed by the organisation, and they cannot be held responsible for the content

© P.J.Granger 2012

...helping you find true love and happiness through your relationships
Triangle Model Explained




We escape from any feelings of heartbreak, failure and guilt by becoming Independent. This usually gives us more success and happiness in the short-term, but it hides a big secret - our Independence is a smokescreen to avoid ever again having to feel the pain of Dependence. As we bury those feelings, we inadvertently damage our relationships and rob ourselves of long-term happiness.

EXPECTATIONS - The central theme of Independence is that we will determine our own success and happiness and stop relying on other people. To do this we create a series of expectations for how we and others must behave to achieve success and avoid the experience of failure that might trigger our hidden guilt.

Recognising when you have become Independent and are placing expectations and demands on yourself and others. Letting go of the need to be successful and seen as a success.

CONTROL & POWER STRUGGLE - Our demands on other people to do things 'our way' results in the need for control which inevitably ends in power struggle and conflict. Arguments and rows in romantic relationships come out of this stage. Deep down we are fighting for our needs to be met that we felt we no met in the past.

Ending your need for control and replacing it with trust.. Learning to catch yourself from entering into power struggles and understanding that they are a call for love. Communicating in ways that end conflict and bring people back together.

THE DEAD ZONE - If a relationship survives the power struggle stage it may end up in the Dead Zone where there is boredom, a lack of energy and a loss of feelings of love in romantic relationship.It happens because to become Independent we disconnect in our relationships and stop feeling our full spectrum of emotions as a way of protecting us from our feelings from dependency.

Learning to recognise when you or others are in this stage and how to escape it without suffering deadness, stress or burnout. Closing the distance both physical and emotional in your romantic relationships.

To escape from the Dead Zone we must open our hearts and emotionally re-connect in our relationships. This means we need to feel our full range of emotions and deal with any remaining issues of failure, inadequacy and guilt from our Dependent period, that have given us a fear of emotional intimacy.
LEADERSHIP - One of the easiest ways to move into Interdependence is to move into Leadership within our relationships which means responding to the emotional needs of the people around us with love and compassion. This can be difficult because of our own fears around emotional intimacy, our tendency to self-attack and our fear of of attack from other people.

Discovering how you can move from Independence to Interdependence (Partnership) by revealing your leadership gifts. Recognising the many calls for help and responding appropriately. Avoiding self-attack.

VISION - As we let go of our fear and guilt, we will naturally reveal our true selves, which will always be full of creativity, confidence and giftedness. We will have faith in a positive future, rather than dwell on the problems and pain of the past. Life will become easier for us and we will increasingly use our intuition to solve problems.

Revealing the real you! Releasing your natural stores of vision, creativity and inspiration. Learning how to work with ease by using your intuition to solve problems and by embracing your giftedness.

MASTERY - During Vision we will have increasingly embraced our higher mind and states of consciousness and recognise that our capacity for love and creativity originates from an innate spirituality. As we let go of our deepest fears we focus on our life's purpose and experience our true potential in our relationships and our work. We live in the present, in a state of love, joy and peace. Learning to trust your spiritual guidance and to live for the moment. Letting-go of your deepest fears and revealing the love that lies beneath. In a state of 'being' rather than 'doing'

If we can gain sufficient self-awareness and access our highest states of consciousness we realise that everything and everybody is connected in a vast energy field that is called Oneness. We are essentially all one and linked by love. This explains why we suffer so much when we deny this state of connection and create separation in our relationships. It also tells us how we can find true happiness - all we need to do is re-connect and embrace the the loving bonds that unite us all.

For those who are really ambitious...Completing the journey through enlightenment to Oneness. Exploring the highest states of consciousness and experiencing total spiritual dependence and the joy that goes with it.

My book Bringing Back This Love is based on this model - click for more information


















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No 1. Relationship
Problem-Solving Tip

Turning Love on it's Head

Why Love Is Your Essence

The Stages of A Relationship
Power Struggle

Dead Zone

Partnership & True Love

How to Save or Improve any Relationship

The Power of Love

Triangle Model Explained

Understanding Emotions

The Origins of Guilt & Low

Top Ten Relationship Tips

Top Ten Dating Tips

Two Hearts Really
Can Beat As One





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